(教會/通用拼音字;四縣/海陸腔)
朱真一(Chu, Chin-yit/Zhu, Zhin-rhit)
上期講到用客台語也可以翻譯英文詩,也講過翻譯詩對提倡母語寫作有盡多好處,但是愛翻譯到好也盡(很)難,因為客台語字彙少,口語多,用來翻外文不容易。看最近有位朋友寄來一本華語翻譯英文介(的)詩集,佢(他)mo一字一字翻,用華語翻英文詩所愛表達介意境。Ngai(我) 想哩(這)係一種盡好介辦法,決定來試看看。選用英文詩來翻,有一好處,較(kha/ka)唔(不)會受到華語詩漢字介影響。上擺翻美國詩人Longfellow
(朗費羅)介詩,試試看後發現可以繼續試驗。
試翻了以後正(才)知mo(無)an(那麼)簡單,大家定著知,翻譯愛翻得好,有三要點:「信、達、雅」第一自家唔(不)係詩人,頭擺(以前)盡少寫詩。愛「雅」盡難,最先放棄「雅」,只想愛做到「信」lau(及) 「達」。煞猛(努力)去讀別人寫介詩求進步。又想儘量用口語,但口語又盡難寫,故所翻介詩難「達」。「達」lau「雅」做唔到,知好求愛「信」,只愛求正確,故所翻介詩看起來可能盡多人會不滿。
還有一個(chak/zhak)問題,等到看網站正知,ngai介電腦軟體mo一定lau別儕(sa,人)共樣。像ngai用「个」(的)時,傳出去,出版佇台灣文學評論網站時,「个」sa(卻)看唔出來,字mo印出來,可能台灣介Big-5電腦碼 mo「个」哩個字,使人看到感覺到奇怪,「个」哩個字佇雜誌時有印出來,想來可能係軟體不同介問題。故所哩擺(次)用「介」來代替,盡多人用「介」字,應當mo問題,頭擺ngai佇網站用mo問題。
講到英文詩,拜倫(George Byron,1788-1824)lau濟慈(John
Keats,1795-1821) 不可能唔講到佢兜,佢兩儕就像台灣文學介鍾肇政lau葉石濤,中國詩人中介杜甫lau李白。兩儕共樣有才氣,留下來介詩到今還係共樣使人心動欣賞。先來翻兩首Byron介作品試看看e。
拜倫lau濟慈出身作風mo 共樣,不過兩儕盡好寫情詩,又寫得不少。拜倫出身貴族,看佢一生中不斷談戀愛,一生有關係介細妹e一大堆,可能哩就係佢寫情詩介靈感來源。盡好去外國,21歲就去歐洲大陸、希臘、土耳其兩年,28歲又再離開英國以後再mo轉去英國,最後36歲死佇希臘。佢介詩不少寫到希臘。
拜倫 (George G. Byron) 介詩
1)她佇靚靚介光彩中行 She
walks in beauty
她(ki/gi)佇靚靚介光彩中行;像暗晡頭 She walks in beauty , like the night
無(mo)雲又星光滿天; Of cloudless
climes and starry skies ;
明lau(與)暗中最美好介(的); And all that’s best of dark and bright
佇(在)她介容貌lau目珠表現, Meet in her aspect and her eyes :
像柔和好看介光, Thus mellowed to that tender light
勝過俗麗介白日多多。 Which heaven to gaudy day denies .
明lau(與)暗中最美好介(的); And all that’s best of dark and bright
佇(在)她介容貌lau目珠表現, Meet in her aspect and her eyes :
像柔和好看介光, Thus mellowed to that tender light
勝過俗麗介白日多多。 Which heaven to gaudy day denies .
增加一份陰影,或減少一點光彩, One shade the more , one ray the
less ,
全會損害哩(這)講唔出來介優雅, Had half impaired the nameless grace
佇她烏雲般介髮上波動, Which waves in every raven tress ,
或佇她面上散佈柔和介光輝, Or softly lightens o’er her face ;
面上有她恬靜甜蜜介思念, Where thought serenely sweet express
講明來處介純潔lau珍貴。 How pure, how dear their dwelling-place .
她介面,她介眉額, And so that cheek , and o’er that brow ,
An(如此)溫柔,平靜,又含情動人, So soft , so calm , yet eloquent ,
她迷人介微笑,她發光介面, The smiles that win , the tints that glow ,
全說明頭擺(從前)她善良介人生, But tell of days in goodness spent ,
她安寧心情之下, A mind at peace with all below ,
還有真誠介愛心! A heart whose love is innocent !
全會損害哩(這)講唔出來介優雅, Had half impaired the nameless grace
佇她烏雲般介髮上波動, Which waves in every raven tress ,
或佇她面上散佈柔和介光輝, Or softly lightens o’er her face ;
面上有她恬靜甜蜜介思念, Where thought serenely sweet express
講明來處介純潔lau珍貴。 How pure, how dear their dwelling-place .
她介面,她介眉額, And so that cheek , and o’er that brow ,
An(如此)溫柔,平靜,又含情動人, So soft , so calm , yet eloquent ,
她迷人介微笑,她發光介面, The smiles that win , the tints that glow ,
全說明頭擺(從前)她善良介人生, But tell of days in goodness spent ,
她安寧心情之下, A mind at peace with all below ,
還有真誠介愛心! A heart whose love is innocent !
2) En兜將不再遊蕩 So We’ll Go No More A-Roving
佇(在)an(這麼)暗介深夜, So late into the night,
雖然en兜介心還係相愛, Though the heart be still as loving,
月光還係an明亮。 And the moon be still as bright.
因為劍套會比劍較(kha/ka)先損壞, For the sword outwears its sheath,
靈魂共樣會比胸腔tong/dong(撐)較久, And the soul wears out the breast,
心愛歇睏(休息)來透氣, And the heart must pause to breathe,
愛情也需要休養。 And Love itself have rest.
雖然夜係為愛情來設, Though the night was made for loving,
白晝就會到轉來, Yet we’ll go no more a-roving
雖然月係還光光。 By the light of the moon.
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